30 Years and 4 Kids Later....

1979 was a pivotal year in my life. I was the bass player in the DJ Band at Buck Lake Ranch. I had joined the band in 1977 and this would be my final year with that band. But it would prove to be the most eventful year, to date, in my life. I had the opportunity to play on the same stage with some of the biggest names in country music that summer; Conway Twitty, Loretta Lynn, Mickey Gilley, Buck Owens, and heroes from my childhood like the Wilburn Brothers and Little Jimmy Dickens. But this wasn't' the real highlight of the Summer of '79.

What makes the Summer of '79 stand out as life changing was meeting my wife, Karen Jetmore. I have been thinking about this summer quite a bit lately, as we just chalked up our 30th wedding anniversary on December 22nd.

My first memory of Karen is imprinted in my memory. My best friend Mickey was dating a girl from Angola. She had just graduated high school and had rented an apartment. We stopped by to visit and see the apartment. Mickey's girlfriend, and eventual wife, Julie was doing some painting and she had some friends over helping her. I remember seeing this young girl with long strawberry/light brown hair and a pair of cut-off shorts with paint on her face. I remember asking who she was and remembering that I thought she was cute. I didn't forget her.

Just a few weeks later Mickey and Julie were going out on a date and they asked me if I wanted to go along. Julie said she would invite her friend, Karen, to come along. I thought, but not for too long, and said, "Yes."

I was living on Snow Lake, in Steuben County at the time. I quickly got ready and waited on them to arrive. When I saw them driving into the driveway I set the stage. I had some some music playing on the turntable and my back to the door looking through a stack of records. I pretended to be nonchalant and cool when they came in. But I was thinking just how cute this sweet young thing was.

Now let me say, I was not the ideal date for Karen. The biggest concern was that I was 24 years old and she was only 15. Yep, not good! On top of that I was a bass player in a country-rock band who thought he was all that and a bag of chips! I was an idiot who was totally ignorant of the fact that he didn't have a clue as to what he was doing.

I remember Karen was wearing a pair of corduroy pants that were rolled up because they were too long for her. I found out later that she was at Julies and didn't have anything to wear. She had borrowed the pants from Julie's room-mate, who was a bit taller than Karen. It didn't matter. To me, they looked great on her. I was smitten immediately. What I began to learn, in a very short time, is that I wasn't prepared for that and the confusion and immaturity caused me to make a lot of mistakes that still haunt me.

We left the house and climbed into Mickey's Monte Carlo and headed to Angola. We went to the Putt Putt golf course that was located by the drive-in theater on the north side of town. Both are now gone. A K-Mart took their place. It's now a Dunham's Sporting Goods Store and a Peeples Department Store. I don't remember much about the game. I kept taking my eye off the ball and keeping it on Karen.

I don't remember much more until the ride home to the Honky Chalet, the nick-name of the A Frame house I lived in on Snow Lake. My former house-mate and former member of the DJ Band, Sonny Tackett wrote a song about the house called Honky Chalet. The name stuck. But I digress. Back to Karen. We were sitting in the backseat. I had my arm around her and she looked up at me and we kissed for the first time. I was getting in deeper. Her eyes, her smile, and everything about her captivated me. That begin a summer of ups downs, joy, sadness, and inner turmoil in me.

We dated throughout the summer but I was torn. I loved her but her age kept haunting me. On top of that I wasn't sure about myself. I was indecisive in one way and impulsive in another. I broke up with her. It was the stupidest thing I ever did in my life! It set some things in motion that I still regret. I found out that I couldn't live without her.

One night I was at home alone with my thoughts. I couldn't get Karen out of my mind.  I had never felt this way before. I had to see her. I called her on the telephone. She was in bed. I told her I loved her and I had to see her. She wanted to see me too. I was elated! Then I remembered that I was nearly out of gasoline in my truck. I told her I was coming anyway!

I drove to Pleasant Lake, where Karen lived with her parents Harold and Linda Jetmore. She was watching for me and met me at the door. She was the most beautiful sight! We were together again. But I still didn't had to come to terms with the whole thing. I finally came to the realization that I could not let her get away. I needed her to be mine forever.

I had sold my pick up truck to my dad and bought an old black Chevy Van. Mickey and I had left the DJ Band and reformed out old band with David Poyser on drums, under a new name. I bought the van so that I could carry our equipment to and from gigs. I was driving down the road in November, 1979, headed north on Main Street in Kendallville. I was going to see Karen. I was listening to the radio and "Babe" by Styx began to play. As I began to listen it spoke right to my heart about how much I loved Karen and never wanted to let her go. Here are those lyrics:

Babe I'm leavin'
I must be on my way
The time is drawing near
My train is going
I see it in your eyes
The love, the need, your tears
But I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
So please believe me
My heart is in your hands
And I'll be missing you

'Cause you know it's you babe
Whenever I get weary
And I've had enough
Feel like giving up
You know it's you babe
Givin' me the courage
And the strength I need
Please believe that it's true
Babe, I love you

You know it's you babe
Whenever I get weary
And I've had enough
Feel like giving up
You know it's you babe
Givin' me the courage
And the strength I need
Please believe that it's true
Babe, I love you

Babe, I'm leavin'
I'll say it once again
And somehow try to smile
I know the feeling we're tryin' to forget
If only for a while
'Cause I'll be lonely without you
And I'll need your love to see me through
Please believe me
My heart is in your hands
'Cause I'll be missing you
Babe, I love you
Babe, I love you
Ooo-oo-oo-oo, babe

As I listened to the song finish my mind was made up. I was going to ask Karen to marry me. She had just turned 16 and was still in high school, far to young to be even talking about marriage, but I was going to ask her to marry me as soon as I got to her house.

I drove up in front of her house and she met me as I opened the van door. I wasted no time in telling her I loved her and wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. I asked her to marry me. She had tears in her eyes, she wrapped her arms around me and said yes and we kissed and my heart was singing. We drove to Fort Wayne and picked out some rings. It's funny how I can still remember her sitting on the engine compartment in the van because it only had two bucket seats and she wanted to sit next to me. I wanted her to sit closely as well! She had on a plaid winter jacket and I remember how her hair flowed around her shoulders over that jacket. She was everything I ever wanted.

Before we went to get the rings I asked her dad if I could marry Karen. I felt sure he would say no, but he said it was fine with him. That surprised me, but made me happy. We planned to wait to get married, but that didn't work. Just under two months later we were married in Bronson, Michigan by the mayor of the town. My mom, Verleen and my dad, Banner (Sr.) and my brothers Rocky and Joe were there, along with Karen's parents. We went to the Bonanza Steakhouse, in Coldwater, afterwards and had dinner. Harold, Karen's dad paid for the meals for the wedding party. That began our life together.

30 years later I look back and there are a lot of things that I did that I would certainly change. But the one thing I wouldn't change is that I married the love of my life. I made so many mistakes due to immaturity, ingnorance, and baggage from a horrendous childhood that I did major damage to our relationship. But the LORD saw us through it.

I made such a mess of our marriage that by 1986 it seemed like everyone who had said it would never last was right. We had two little girls at the time, Laura and Christy, but I had made such a mess of it that Karen was ready to throw in the towel. But in 1987 I threw in the towel and gave my life to the LORD. That began a work in me, and in our marriage that kept us together and resulted in another daughter, Brook, in 1990, and then later our last child, a son named Luke, in 2000.

So here we are, 30 years later, still together. I love my bride more than ever. I am committed to making the next 30 years even better than the first 30. But the excitement, joy, and newly discovered love that began it all 30 years ago is a spark that will never die and will alway be special. I'm a blessed man and I thank Yahweh every day. If it had not been for HIM and HIS work of grace in me I wouldn't be able to write this today.

Maybe you're a young man and you are newly married or you have now find the woman that is to be your wife. My advice to you is to surrender your life to Yeshua, Jesus and allow HIM to change your heart and to cause you to obey HIS commandments. You will love HIM because HE loves you so much that HE will supply you with grace. Because of your love you will keep HIS commandments. When you keep HIS commandments, contained in HIS Torah Instructions you will love and protect your wife in ways that you could never do in the flesh. HIS commandments are meant to be HIS expression of love. It is HIS expression to us, giving us Torah, and our expression to HIM to obey, and to one another in keeping them. Torah commandments are totally selfless. My problem for the first 8 years, and still working on, is selfishness. We all deal with that sin. It is the heart of an unregenerate man or woman. But HE sets us free from sin and begins a work in your life that is one of pure beauty to those you love. You will know HIS love and are able, by HIS grace to express that love. HE is waiting for you to respond to HIS Voice. Hear HIM and repent of your own ways, believe the promises contained in HIS Word that HE will change you so that you can live pleasingly before HIM, and you will begin to change. You will love it, your bride will love it, and you won't sow so many bad seeds and reap a bitter harvest like I have.

Blessings...... -Banner

Rambling Thoughts

This photo is of me playing with my older sister Linda. Mom is sitting in the background watching us while holding my younger sister Karen. This was probably around 1958 or 1959, I suppose. Jane, my youngest sister, wasn't born until 1963. Rocky came along in 1968 and Joseph was born in 1972.

The photo was in my Papaw Green's living room in the Tanyard Branch, on Little Mud Creek, in Floyd County Kentucky. The boxing gloves were my Uncle Edd's. I believe he had brought them back from his time in the army. Edd was in Korea.

Some of my favorite memories of the Tanyard included going to the barn with Papaw Green when it was milking and feeding time in the evening. We usually didn't get back to the house until it was beginning to grow dark. I can remember the lightning bugs and the warm summer evenings. We would have supper and Renie, Papaw Green's wife and my step-grandmother, would usually have fresh clabbered milk. That's a kind of home-made buttermilk for you yankees.

Supper, especially in the summer, always had the staples of fresh green beans, cucumbers, tomatoes, onions, cornbread, and sometimes some muskmelon. Often fried chicken was a part of the meal. We would sit at this long table made of rough lumber. I don't know how long it had been in the house, but probably for a long time, since Papaw Green had eleven children. Behind the table, along the wall with windows behind it was a long bench that we kids sat at. I can still remember all of us sitting down at that table and eating together. It wasn't all good all the time, but I do have fond memories of the Tanyard and Papaw Green.

Papaw Green had two mules. One was named Jane and the other Pearl. Sometimes he would let me ride them. I don't know how big they really were, but they seemed to be really big to a little kid. He used the mules to plow and tend his huge garden.

At the head of the Tanyard Branch Papaw Green had an orchard. In the fall we would pick apples. The back porch of the house would have bushel baskets of apples on it. Frames of wood with tin laid on them would be used to place sliced apples to dry for winter storage.

One of the things that marked late fall/early winter was the hog killing time. Now that I understand that the LORD didn't create hogs to be food, according to Leviticus, in HIS Word, I hesitate even discussing this, but it was what we did. Pork was the main meat staple in most East Kentucky families. Most families raised a hog or two to butcher. Chicken was often on the hillbillies dinner plate, but we didn't have much beef.

One of the old sayings that I remember from mom, dad, and my grandparents was something like this; "They had a pure hogkilling time over there!" Now realize that this was a not intended to say they were simply butchering a hog. This old saying meant that there was a fight or huge quarrel that got way out of control. I've often wondered why this saying was used in that regard. I don't know, but maybe God has a sense of trying to say something to people that they might not be listening to. Could HE have been saying all along that hogs were not meant for human consumption? I don't know. And whether HE was saying that or not, in that old expression, I do know now that pork is not for human consumption.

Another common event in East Kentucky was having church at someone's home. This happened especially if someone was seriously ill and couldn't come to the church house or was nearing death. Everyone would gather in and the meeting would go into the night. In the event of a person nearing death the gathering could last most of the night. While the singing and preaching was going on we kids used to run around outside and catch lightning bugs or play hide and seek or tag.

One time I remember in particular. The house meeting that we attended was about 2 miles up the road from our house. We lived just across the creek from Grannie and Papaw, my mom's parents. Their names were Marion and Mae. We were all at the meeting and as it was ending some of us kids began walking home together. I was pretty little but my Uncle Bud, mom's brother, and his friend and his friends little brother were with us, so mom let us go with them. It proved to be quite an eventful evening.

As we were walking home we heard a gunshot. Then a pickup truck with some men in it drove by us. The driver had a shotgun hanging out of the driver's side window. As we rounded the corner we saw a man laying on the front porch who had been shot by these men. Some of the older men who were behind us came along and went to help him. They told us to run on home. We did, as fast as our feet would carry us!

We learned later that the shooting was a result of a game of cards that caused a fight. They had already beaten the man with one of those old wooden pop bottle cases. He tried to get help but no one would open the door to let him in. They were afraid. He was pounding on the door of the home where he was shot, begging them to let him in and they were too afraid to do it. He didn't die from his wounds, but he was paralyzed for life. I don't know what happened to the shooters.

Well that turned out to be quite a story that began with a simple photo of me and Linda playing with some boxing gloves, but there it is. More from the Life and Times of a Displace Hillbilly! Be seein' you, LORD willing.

Indian Summer in Stroh

The temperature in Stroh was near 70 today with sunshine and low humidity. It was a beautiful fall day in Northeast Indiana. The old folks always talked about Indian Summer. Indian Summer usually follows some freezing temps. We had those; a few frosts and even some snow, so this would probably qualify. According to the weather man we have 40's for highs coming this weekend. It is that time of year.

This fall weather always takes me back to Autumn days of the past. I love the smell of leaves burning, wood smoke from fires, and sometimes I can almost swear I smell smoke from a coal burning stove. That's what we heated with when I was a little boy in Kentucky. I remember burning my butt on that hot stove one time when I was little. My potty was next to it and when I went to sit down my butt hit the hot stove. I don't know how old I was but that memory stuck with me.

Fall reminds me of going back to school. In Kentucky I went to a 3 room school house through second grade. It set alongside the creek bank and we had a dirt playground. Marbles was the game of choice for the boys, most of the time. But the older kids played basketball and baseball. As it got colder we always had a milk break in the morning around a big pot-bellied coal stove in the middle of the room. I remember that the milk had slushy ice in the cartons. I always looked forward to that.

Have a nice fall.

It's Sabbath in Strohtucky.... Awesome day!!!!!

Yep, this hillbilly (Strohbilly) observes the Sabbath on the 7th day, like the Bible says! So, Shalom ya'll!

The picture is me and Lou on a hike at Pokagon State Park in Angola about 2 months ago. He's my son and my best little buddy.

I'm sitting here on Sabbath morning with my almost nine year old son, Luke. We sometimes call him Lou or Louey! Anyway he's my buddy and blesses his old dad a ton. I thank the LORD for him every day. I want him to write some on this blog. This Displaced Hillbilly has a son who has some Hoosier in him so I suppose he is a Hoobilly or Hillsier? I like Hoobilly better. I love him! So look for posts from him from time to time.

Meanwhile, it's chilly outside the old Redmond double wide. We've got a fire in the woodburner, coffee black and hot, and some turkey bacon and eggs coming soon. Me and Lou are HUNGRY! We're waiting for my sleepy headed daughter, Laura, to get up. She's supposed to fix up this delectable delight for us.

After breakfast we will read the Scripture together and then head off the Messiah Fellowship at around 4:30.

We ain't rich by the world's standards, but we are rich beyond compare in HIM. The house is warm, we have food, we have jobs, we have a great family at Messiah Fellowship, we have our little family here in Stroh, and we have one another, all because we are rich in HIM, because we have HIM, and HE has us... that would be the LORD, the Messiah Yeshua I'm talking about.

Anyway, look for Lou to get on here sometimes, and maybe some of the rest of the family as well.

Hope your house and home are blessed today, in HIM.
Banner - the Displaced Hillbilly

I haven't posted here in a quite awhile

It's getting chilly at night in Stroh. Gotta get the chimney cleaned this evening so we can fire up the woodburner. It's a strange thing with my little girl Brook being off at IU for her first year of college. She's been away now since the last week of August. We won't see her till Thanksgiving. The longest she was away from home before this was a week traveling with her big sisters. My little guy, Luke misses her a lot.

I've been writing for my Torah Perspective blog and Pastor Ron and I just did a radio interview with a brother over in Australia. It is the Feast of Sukkot this week and we're having a blast getting together with our family in Yeshua.

Abba willing I plan to post here more often... more of a family, friends, life happenings kind of thing.